HI GUYS!
This is one of my absolute favorite stories to tell. Looking back on this trip, I have so many fond memories of the entire experience. For starters, yes, I was 16 years old at the time I decided I wanted to participate in a foreign exchange program in France.
Well, for starters, my high school did this amazing opportunity through the French Department that if you were a French student at the high school, you could participate in this trip. On average, they would take about 20 students from the entire school on the trip, and you had to apply. Typically, most of the students who participated in this trip were third or fourth year French students. I, on the other hand, had just barely finished a year of French and had it under my belt. This was a challenge. But I was up for it.
I went home the night I found out that the trip was going to be held over Spring Break and I announced to my parents not with the “asking” attitude, but more of the “I’m doing this” attitude when I told them my dream.
My parents have always known that I am incredibly determined, hardworking, and motivated when it comes to anything I want to do. That’s just how my personality works. I believe if there’s something you want to do, you’ll find a way to do it. So, they knew that I would muster up the cash to go.
Oh, boy did I. Once I was accepted into the program, I paid for the entire trip myself. Between the airfare, hotel fees, food, tour guides, and souvenirs I probably spent about $5,500 on the trip total. All of which, I proudly worked my part time high school job and earned all of the money for which I had been saving up.
So, Spring 2013, during the first day of my Spring Break as a junior in high school, I flew to France.
What an experience. May I say that. Before this, I had never ever been to Europe. And I have never gone without my family. I’ve gone out of the country to cruises down in the Caribbean and Mexico, but that was the extent of my foreign experiences.
After about a 9 hour flight, having all of my bags personally searched and being pat down in airport security, we arrive.
The French International Airport itself gave me a whole whirlwind of emotions. There were so many people, moving, talking, walking in different directions, all so incredibly fast paced. I felt like I was standing there frozen in a sea of fish just swimming past me. I did not even know where to begin because I didn’t understand more than half of the things they were saying. It all just became noise.
The biggest shock that first hit me was when people came up to me asking me questions while they were speaking fluent French. I mean, granted, only know the typical greetings, how to order food, and basic directions I was at a lost for words. But this is where my learning experience truly began and really kicked in.
I had to fully emerge myself in the culture and focus to really, really get a grip on how it was going to be. Talking to the French was equivalent to being tested about 100% of the time on your verbal communication skills, you truly did not have any other choice.
After we arrived we spent about two nights in a little hotel within a small town known as Tours before meeting our exchange families. This town was absolutely beautiful and a perfect way to gain exposure before leaving the group of students I came with from my high school to go stay with the host family that only spoke French.
So the day came when it was time to separate from my group and move in for the next 9 days with my host family. Prior to leaving the United States, I had briefly been able to email my exchange student in order to get an idea of what she was like, her name was Caroline. She had no Facebook, no Twitter, no Instagram, no Snapchat, just absolutely nothing. Only an email. How old fashioned right? I had no clue what she was going to really look or be like.
We arrive to their high school, which is a private school that kinda looks the equivalent to a mini college campus. However, that school host grades Kindergarten through 12th Grade. There is a different building for each subject and grade level, and basically they switch classes between different buildings throughout the day.
The English teacher at their school takes us down to the Cafeteria where we are supposed to wait for our foreign exchange students to come down and pick us up and take us home with them. Where we are left to just patiently, patiently wait.
Some of the French students arrive almost immediately to the Cafeteria, take their American exchange student and leave. This goes on for about 30 minutes. As the group of the American exchange students becomes smaller and smaller, I become more nervous and anxious as to what’s going to happen to me. An hour passes. Caroline still hasn’t come for me. An hour and a half, still nothing. I begin to really worry. Tears slowly fill my eyes because I feel that I am absolutely forgotten about in a foreign place and I do not know what I am going to do. Finally, two hours later, she comes for me. Making me the last person picked up in the cafeteria.
When she comes to pick me up she just looks at me. No hug, no smile, no excitement, nothing. Just a blank stare. So, eagerly, I say, “Bonjour!” in which she reciprocates back and asks me “Ca va?” which means, How are you? I engage her in a very basic French conversation to start off the evening.
I follow her out of the mini college campus looking school. I follow her down the sidewalk and around the corners. All while carrying my 50 pound luggage. I follow her down side roads and across big streets. I follow, I follow, I follow. Finally, we come to a big traffic circle, with a car waiting, parked. This is when I met Caroline’s mother.
Her mother jumped out of the car and said “Hello!” with a very, very heavy French accent. In this moment, I knew that “Hello!” was probably just about the only word she really knew how to speak in English, if not for a few more basic phrases. This worried me. Before coming on this trip, my French teacher back in the United States informed me that these French students abroad were supposed to have about 7-8 years of English under their belt. In other words, completely fluent. This wasn’t the case with me.
As I get in the backseat of her mother’s car and Caroline jumps in the passenger seat, they both turn around starring at me. I kinda got that feeling like I was a new puppy they were bringing home where they just stare at you in awe. So, without knowing how else to handle a situation, I laugh.
However, French people don’t laugh. At least not these ones. They looked taken back and offended that I was giggling out of nervousness. They thought it was quite odd for me to be doing so.
So I sit hands crossed and ride the rest of the way to their house which was in Saint Germain, France. It is a little suburb right on the outskirts of Paris. On the way there they are telling me about how their house is worth “1.5 million dollars”. In my mind, I’m picturing a gorgeous mansion, absolutely huge house.
We arrive. To a small, small house. Where they make me lug my suitcase up a spiral staircase, and INTO THE ATTIC. Talk about experiences. After following me up and placing my suitcase down, the whole family very excitingly insists that I come outside. So, I follow, again. I follow them down their path to their yard, and over towards a very small small shed looking structure.
My exchange student, goes inside, and pulls out a chicken. She looks at me and says “hold it”.
This completely took me by surprise. I was shocked this girl wanted me to hold her pet chicken. Where I come from, the extent of your pets was perhaps a dog, maybe a cat, or some small hamsters? You didn’t just go out and hold your pet chicken. It wasn’t a thing.
So, I touch her chicken, more so out of a sense of respect. And then I tell her I don’t eat eggs (which I do) so she doesn’t make me go fetch these eggs in the morning and eat them. Hahaha.
The first two nights were difficult for me, especially in the sense of becoming adjusted to speaking French 100% of the time if I wanted to say something, the 12 hour time difference, and well just sleeping in an attic.
However, the entire trip became to be a wonderful experience. While Caroline went to school, I would go back and meet up with my American group during the day to go out and do some type of touristy adventure. Then once the French students got out of school, we would go back and meet up with them. I always liked meeting back up with the American students because it gave me a chance to speak English again.
While we were on the trip throughout the two weeks, we saw many small French towns, of course Paris, and I even went to Normandy for a weekend with Caroline. However, while I was out and about on my adventure, here are a few things that I learned:
1. There are hardly any blonde people in France.
Being essentially a natural blonde, immediately made me stand out to be very noticeable while I was there. People were constantly and consistently remarking on my hair color and how I must have been foreign. I would like to say that 90% of the people I saw had dark brown or black hair while I was there. I was considered to be the “odd ball”.
2. Don’t assume anyone speaks English.
Once when the group of American foreign exchange students from my high school were staying in the town of Tours, we went walking around and sightseeing. Well, there’s a strip in the main part of town with a bunch of cute shops, restaurants, and bakeries. In one of the shops, there was a group of Americans from Miami and they were just simply on vacation. Well, they went up to the store clerk and demanded to know prices/deals very rudely and was instantly speaking in English, assuming the clerk would respond in English. Then the clerk made them leave because she was offended that they assumed she would speak English for them when they wouldn’t even attempt French.
3. Eating with your elbows on the table is not considered rude.
One night, my host family took me out to this beautiful French restaurant. I remember sitting and thinking to myself that I wanted to leave a really great impression on this family as an American student coming into their home. So, in order to do, I made sure all of my manners were flawless. You know the ones you learned as a child, sitting up straight, hands and elbows off the table, putting your napkin on your lap, etc. Well, the entire family was eating with their elbows on the table and made a remark to me that it is indeed considered rude if you do not have your elbows on the table. It is a sign that shows you are not enjoying your meal. So, from that night forward, my elbows were on the table.
4. Playing charades is acceptable.
Since the family barely spoke English, most of my communication skills with them were comparable to a game of charades. I was constantly acting out what I was trying to say, you know, doing the arm motions, body motions, and really utilizing my body language. The host family described me as fitting a very “outgoing” stereotype because of the humor I brought to the household, however I was simply most of the time just trying to get across my point.
5. Cars will NOT stop for you, even if you’re in a crosswalk.
When I was in Paris with the host family one evening I recall walking down the streets and coming to an intersection. When the family said, come on let’s go, and walked right in front of a car moving 25 mph flying down the streets, I went with my gut and stayed where I was. The locals are fearless when it comes to walking across the streets, so they just put themselves out there.
7. Pick-pocketers are not as sneaky as you think.
Throughout this trip I was constantly reminded to keep my belongings near me. You know, your passport, your wallet, your money, and your cell phone. I carried a cross body Michael Kors bag at the time, that had a zipper closure. I highly recommend the zipper closure because it’s a little bit harder to access. Also, carry your bag in front of your body, not behind it. Most of the pick-picketers that approached me, I played their little game. They would ask me a series of questions, you know, trying to distract me, so that another one of their buddies had the opportunity come up and steal something off me. I smiled at them and said “Nice try, I know what you’re doing”, and immediately they left me alone.
8. Climbing the Eiffel Tower will be the hardest workout of your life.
This is one of my top ten favorite things I’ve ever done in my life. Instead of taking the traditional elevator to the top of the Eiffel Tower, we decided that we would climb all 1,710 steps that would allow us to go as high as we could. During this climb, I experienced rain, wind, snow, and completely freezing conditions. It was absolutely breathtaking at the top. I love watching the paper airplanes we made out of the pamphlets fly down and hit the tops of the heads of the tourists way, way, way below us.
9. French people do not shower everyday like Americans.
This is something I had to get used to. Since I am crazy about my hygiene, I have to shower at least once a day. However, this is not the case with the French. I am used to having a time during the morning typically where everyone in the household “gets ready”. Well while I was staying in the French household there was no “time”, you woke up, you ate, and you were ready to go. This resulted in me choosing to shower at night before I went to bed.
10. You will fall in love with Nutella.
I had NEVER had Nutella before I went to France. They eat Nutella on absolutely everything. And let me tell you, it is delicious. I absolutely love and crave that hazelnut spread now. I remember the first breakfast they ever gave me was a full sized baguette completely covered in Nutella. Oh, so so so good.
Going abroad truly is a life changing and eye opening experience. It made me forever grateful and appreciate of the lifestyle that I live here in America. I also love the exposure and knowledge I gained while I was overseas. I would definitely recommend anyone go abroad, as I plan to adventure out on another abroad trip for 5 weeks next summer in Italy. Caroline did in fact come and stay with me here in the states for 2 weeks after I was there in France. I will share that story at another time of what it was like bringing her to America.
Have any of you ever studied abroad or done a foreign exchange program?
-Ash
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